Category Archives: money

Arizona needs to wake up and smell the Petrol.

02 Monday Oct 2023

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Let me say, at this writing, gasoline is up to $4.25 a gallon and I know, yes I know, many of you are in places where the prices are two and three dollars above that.

That said, Tucson and most of Arizona is very car dependent due to the fact that everything is so spread out. It is pretty impossible to exist here, in any comfort, without a car. Recently, my car has been in the shop three times for a repeated number of repairs. At $1200 for repairs and over $200 in Lyft/Uber rides, we’ll see if three times is the charm.

The bus system: the bus system here runs every 30 minutes on weekdays (when they aren’t late) and every hour on weekends. Most services stop around 7ish, so if you have some evening event to attend, you are out of luck. The system has good apps for your phone. However, if you don’t have a phone, if your phone is out of charge, if you don’t know/can’t find the app, you are out of luck. The bus stops all have metal signs with the route number. There are no bus schedules with the times, no maps with the routes, their starting/stopping points and no information about when they stop running. Inside of the bus, a digital screen displays a stop when a customer pulls the stop cord. Again, there are no bus schedules, no times, no maps, no starting/stopping points, etc. As a result of this, bus drivers are continuely beleagered by passengers asking a thousand questions. This is stressful to them because 1) they have to answer the same questions over and over and b) they are on a tight schedule and are not supposed to be late to their next stop.

Lyft/Uber: since I have taken so many rides this month, I have spent time tracking the costs. During the day, approximately before 4-5 pm, the cost, per mile, can be as low at $1.78 per mile. As the day progresses, the cost can then jump to $3.00+ per mile. The evenings are the real killers; rides to entertainment events in the evenings for the basic same distance can be a whopping $30 each way! Boy, am I in the wrong business!

A lot of this, of course, is pushed by the rising and fluctuating prices of gas. If the city had decent and dependable public transportation, then all of us would not have to be stuck in the giant maw which is the automotive/petrol complex. Like flys stuck in a sticky webb, we can never break free. Again, time to wake up and smell the petrol!!!!!!

10 Cities and their Public Transport Systems

01 Sunday Oct 2023

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MAR 22, 2021

10 Cities With The Best Public Transportation and What Transit Planners Can Learn From Them

REMIX

Living in Arizonia, a place with extremely poor public transportation, we could learn a lot from these model cities.

10. Portland, Oregon

Because Portland, Oregon, residents care a lot about the environment, it’s no surprise that they have a pretty great city transportation infrastructure. They have a bus and rail system (known as TriMet), and residents and visitors alike can easily get around the city for cheap fare.

There is a light rail line that runs to the airport, and both buses and trains run around every 15 minutes each day. The city also has a Hop Fastpass app which makes it easy to manage fares and pay for rides from a smartphone. All transit stations in Portland are ADA accessible, another big plus.

9. Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania

Commuters in Pittsburgh can take advantage of both bus rides and an underground light rail, which is known as the T. A one-way ride on a bus or train is $2.50 if riders have a ConnectCard, or if they pay cash it’s $2.75.

All of Pittsburgh’s buses and light rail vehicles are accessible with ramps or lifts. There are 53 T stations, and the T runs from 5 a.m. until midnight each day. When waiting for the bus, users can get alerts via text with TrueTime-to-Text to find out when a bus is coming‌.

8. Denver, Colorad‌o

Denver has a great system set up for public transit, with 68.4% of residents approving of the infrastructure. All stations are ADA accessible, and the city has both bus and rail options for riders, with over 125 bus routes. These systems connect easily to the airport and sports stadiums.

Rail rides can range from $2.60 to $9.00 depending on the length of the ride, and day passes cost $5.20 for bus or rail for local service. This system is fairly straightforward and helps people get across the vast city each day with minimal effort.

7. Madison, Wisconsi‌n

The smaller city of Madison, Wisconsin, is home to the University of Wisconsin and is a great place for families to settle down. Their Metro transportation system is an example of a bus-only transportation strategy that functions well for residents, visitors, and university students.

The city’s transportation team is redesigning the bus system, which supports about 12.9 million riders. The government is asking for community feedback to help improve the system as the city comes out of the pandemic. This kind of collaboration through community support and feedback is a great way to ensure that riders’ needs are being met.‌

6. Chicago, Illinois

Chicago is the nation’s third-largest city and has one of the best transit structures out there — the CTA. This system includes many different bus routes and train lines that connect all over the city, and 90.7% of residents approve of the transportation system. Chicago also has a robust Metra system of railways to connect to the many different suburbs so commuters can get into town without having to sit in heavy car traffic.

Ridership was down in 2020 because of the pandemic, but these systems normally support nearly 500 million people each year. The train system, known as the El because it is mostly on elevated tracks, has eight different routes designated by color with 145 train stations, many of which are ADA accessible. Getting around the windy city — including from both big airports, to downtown, and to the suburbs — is a breeze with the CTA. One-way trips cost $2.50 for the train and $2.25 for the bus.

5. Washington, D.C.

The nation’s capital has a successful transit system that makes it easy to get around the main city center as well as commute from the suburbs and nearby regions. The city’s subway system is called the Metro, and there are also connecting MARC trains for Maryland riders and the VRE for those coming in from Virginia.

The subway usually takes on nearly 200 million trips each year; it is the second-largest system in the U.S. based on ridership. The bus system also takes on around 130 million trips every year. There are 91 Metro stations, so people can hop on from many different neighborhoods throughout the area.

4. New York, New York‌

Of course, we can’t talk about public transportation in America without mentioning New York City’s Metro, the nation’s largest system. On an average weekday, the subway supports 5.5 million riders with almost 1.7 billion riders each year. There are 472 subway stations with Times Square being the busiest.

The city also has a successful bus system with 2.2 million riders on average per weekday. Over 77% of residents approve of the system, and over half of residents take public transit to commute, a higher percentage than any other U.S. city. New York also has a ferry system for commuters on top of its commuter trains, subways, and buses.

Supporting the largest city in the country, the Metro is a great example of how to coordinate so many moving parts for a successful transportation system.

3. San Francisco, California

Travelers to San Francisco love the city’s historic cable cars, but the city also has a bus system, a light rail system known as the BART, and the Muni, which is a municipal railway. The city uses a lot of electric power for its public transportation, making it more energy-efficient and economical than other cities.

There are about 220 million riders each day in San Francisco. Because traffic can be very congested, taking transit helps cut down the average commute time.

2. Boston, Massachusetts

The Boston metro system includes a subway (known as the T), an extensive bus system, and a trolley car service. Over 30% of Boston residents use public transit to get to work. The T connects to the airport, Harvard, and other key locations throughout the area.

Boston has the fifth-largest mass transit system in the U.S. and serves over 4 million people across the region. Another plus of Boston’s system is that 20% of the electricity is bought from certified renewable energy sources.

1. Seattle, Washington

Seattle can be a role model for many cities on successful transportation infrastructure. Even though Seattle isn’t the largest city by any means, its transportation system is robust and features rail, buses, streetcars, and water taxis.

A study from WalletHub found that Seattle’s ridership numbers continue to grow as the city expands its service. The company ranked Seattle number one when comparing transit systems across 100 cities in the U.S. based on accessibility, convenience, safety, reliability, and available resources. All of the city’s transit stations are ADA accessible‌.

Because Seattle is now the sixth most congested U.S. city, transit helps residents significantly decrease average commute times and provides a fast and easy way for visitors to get around.

What Transit Planners Can Learn

These 10 cities can show city planners a lot about what works in public transportation systems. Here is a walk-through of some of the most crucial components:‌

  • Accessibility: Most of these systems have most if not all of their stations and vehicles accessible according to ADA standards. This is a must when planning so that services are available to all residents.
  • Convenience: Transit stops should be located in areas that people frequent often, with access to places like universities, airports, downtown areas, and others. Keep in mind why visitors come to the city and which are the top attractions, and ensure these locations are easily accessible by bus or train.
  • Affordability: One of the biggest benefits of using public transport is the ability to save money on gas and commuting. This is why fares should be reasonable and affordable for the masses. This requires a study of the average income of a city and surrounding areas, in addition to research about what other cities charge.
  • Frequency: Riders need to be able to depend on consistent, reliable service. Otherwise, they’ll resort to finding other ways to get around. According to one survey of 3,000 people, frequency was one of the most important factors when considering satisfaction with transit. Make sure that service is increased during rush hour and other busy periods and that delays are rare and well-communicated to riders.
  • Options: Almost all of the top 10 cities with best public transportation included a mix of options, including subways, rails, and buses. This gives riders more choices and opportunities to catch a ride no matter where they are in the city.
  • Visitor-friendly: Public transit systems should be easy for visitors to use and understand. This requires posting maps in many different locations and including all applicable details on the city’s website, including timetables and fare information.
  • Technology: Today’s riders love using their phones to pay for service or upload funds. Consider creating an app so that people can track buses and trains and even pay for each ride with their smartphones.

‌

Inflation continues to bite; Lyft rides.

27 Wednesday Sep 2023

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A month ago, my car developed some problems and the dreaded engine light went on. Since I had moved to a new neighborhood, my old mechanic was now, further away. Being enterprising, I thought, ‘Let’s try someone new. Those prices are too high anyway!’ I got on Yelp and found a local shop with good reviews. I set an appointment and took it in. After discussion, it was agreed the mechanic would work on the fuel line. A day later I had 4 new spark plugs, rotated coils and a flushed fuel line. I picked up the car. It worked great. For five days. Then the light went on again. Called back to the shop. Had to bring it back in. What now? Well, could be the ignition coils. How much? $200 per coil. Wow!

So, since I had just paid a small fortune to move into my one-bed apartment ($1,600), I was strapped for cash. I had paid $421 for the first repair job and didn’t have the addition $400 for a second repair. Me: “Can I drive this car?” “Oh, no, Ma’am, don’t drive it with the engine light on.” Got it. Can’t drive the car and can’t afford to fix it. Will have to wait for my next payday.

So, for the rest of the month I have a) walked b) ridden the bus and c) taken Lyft here and there. The cost of gas in this area has now risen to $4.25 per gallon. Lyft sends me a message after each ride to tell me the cost (linked to my checking account) and that includes the miles. My father, who was big into math, used to always talk about algorithms. I wish I had paid closer attention.

The Lyft program follows a algorithm (Uber too) and it calculates the prices of the ride based on a) distance b) time to get there and c) the time of day. Therefore, the ride prices can vary wildly and seem to be particularly high in the evenings going to movie and entertainment events. My rides have swung from a very reasonalbe $1.94 per mile ride (DMV) to a whopping $5.73 per mile coming home from the theater. All in all, in one month, I have paid well over $200 for Lyft rides and usually, I am going less that 10 miles in one direction.

Back to the mechanic. Live and learn. After chaatting up a number of Lyft drivers, I found out (!!!!) that by going to O”Reilly Parts or Autoworld, I could get a free diagnosis on the meaning of the engine light. I drove the mechanical beast to the parts shop. In less than 10 minutes, the man had pulled out a little handheld device, attached to the panel on my dash and diagnosed ‘failure of coil #1’. Viola! Job done. In thinking back to my encounter with the shop, I remembered the words ‘diagnosis’ were never mentioned. We were just pulling out parts and sticking in parts and seeing what worked. Sigh.

So, today I am back to the old shop. The mechanic told me up front that ‘diagnosis’ was $200. Before I start screaming, I guess I need to review the last month and see what the whole mess has already cost me.

The last little bit, and this will be a blog for another day, I was able to experience first hand how very less than perfect our city’s bus system in. However, also, before I start bashing them too much, I was able to hear (overhear) a conversation between a driver and a passenger. Apparently, no less than four female bus drivers had been sexually assualted by passengers in the recent days. It is a sign of our times and one that needs to be addressed. cew

The Shoes

10 Tuesday Jan 2023

Posted by in homelessnes, money, poetry

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She stared and stared at my shoes.

I looked down at my feet – leather
sandals with blue, rhinestone straps.

My fresh pedicure winked back at me with
gold sparkle polish.

I looked back at her. Now her head was hanging
way down like she was thinking.

“If I could just have the shoes, it would all be okay.”

I looked away. She made me uncomfortable with her
shabby clothes and dirty hands, holding the handle of the old
metal shopping cart.

It was filled to the brim with stuff, flotsam and jetsam, boxes and bags
in all mis-matched colors and styles. They matched her clothes.

Her head hung down so you couldn’t see her eyes.

I glanced at my Seiko watch to check the time. Didn’t want to be
late for that hair appointment.

She had on an old visor, stuck in her hair that mostly hid her face.
I readjusted the ear buds on my Apple I-phone.

I didn’t want to look at her, share her shame. Irresistibly my
eyes were pulled back to her riding on this crowded subway.

Why so many bags and boxes? Ah, this is her house that she carries with her.
Of course.

She blends in here, with all the other people, all going somewhere.
She could be anyone else.

It’s when she leaves here and goes up to the street,
that’s when she has to become someone who has
somewhere to go, someone to meet.

But there is no one and nowhere. Just the street.

I check my lipstick in the mirror in my handbag,
the train is slowing down.

Time to get back to my life.

Elu’s Story – Part VI

28 Wednesday Dec 2022

Posted by in dating, families, Fiction, Jobs and the workplace, marriage, money, Native Americans, romance, Uncategorized

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The door to Jan’s bedroom was closed. For whatever reason, Elu seemed to be seeing less and less of her roommate these days. She shook her head and checked her purse. There was some money in there. She grabbed her coat and purse. The corner store would have cereal and milk. She couldn’t face much else right now. She closed the front door behind her.

It was cold outside and Elu had to be careful to pick her way through the snow and ice on the sidewalk. The ice could be lethal she knew and didn’t want to slip. She got to her apartment building and put in the key code to get in. She was walking up the stairs to the apartment when she heard the yelling. Who was that? She stopped in front of their door and was about to put the key in the lock when she realized the door wasn’t closed. The sound of her roommate Jan filled the apartment.

“I know you took it, you slimy bastard!” she screamed. “Now where is it?”

Elu came around the corner holding her bag. Sabastian was sitting casually at the kitchen table twirling a DosEquis beer bottle and looking down at it. Jan was dangerously close to him, leaning over. The veins in the side of her neck were bulging and her face was red.

“Hey, it’s not big deal. I just borrowed it for a little. You’ll get it back, don’t  over-react.” His tone was casual and bland.

“Over-react, over-react! I don’t want it someday. I want it back now! Give me that slip,” Jan demanded and stuck her hand in the young man’s face.

With a slight movement of his wrist, Sebastian pulled out a slip of white paper from a jacket pocket and handed it over. Jan snatched it out of his hand and turned, seeing Elu for the first time.

“And tell your Godamn boyfriend to stay out of my room in the future!” she raged. Jan was still in her outer coat and her purse swung back and forth over her shoulder. She pushed past Elu still with the angry look and stuffed the paper in her purse. She slammed out the front door.

Elu came into the kitchen and put the bags on the table. She slowly lowered herself to a chair.

“What…” was all she could get out.

“Oh, hell,” Sebastian took a drag on his bottle. “It’s no big deal. I just borrowed that red stone ring of hers for a little while. She’ll get it back.” He smirked and added, “You make lots of money,” and took another sip.

“Like you borrowed my gold necklace?” she asked him.

“Baby…” he scooted the chair closed to her. “I’m just having a little down time right now. I’m a lover not a fighter. I’ll be back in no time. We still love each other, right?” he gazed into her eyes.

Elu felt hypnotized. “Yes,” she said softly.

“Good, good.” He smiled again. “Got to go, know when I’m not welcome. Got you a little gift.” He pushed a tiny paper packet her way. “Enjoy. Love you.” He kissed her on the forehead. “Got to go before Bitchzilla comes back and ruins the evening. See you later.”

He picked up his beer and headed for the door then turned. “Don’t worry about your dumb necklace. It’s just for a little while. I got some great leads coming in. You’ll see.” He went out the door and closed it behind him.

Elu sat and stared at the packet. She knew what was in it. She wanted it and didn’t want it. Blow, Sebastian called it. She picked up the little package and put it into a teapot on a shelf. Not now, maybe later.

Sebastian was a few years older than Elu and had come to New York to be a stocks and bonds trader. He had ¾ of a college degree in marketing and dropped out of school to ‘make the big bucks’ he had told her. From Scottsdale and from a well-to-do family, the young man was used to the good life and did indeed make the big bucks for a while. But the early wake up hours and the pressure got to be too much for him and he dropped out of that line of work.

He had done sales of all sorts and with his good looks and charm always managed to do well and make money. Somehow, something always seemed to get in the way and he ended up out of work, looking for another job. Right now, he was trying his hand at hedge fund trading and was convinced this was really the ticket this time. In the meantime, all the money Elu was used to making every week seemed to be dissolving into thin air and she couldn’t figure it out.

When the month came that she didn’t have enough for rent, Jan gave her a long, cold stare.

“I will cover you this time, girlfriend, but no more. Get that lazy boyfriend of yours to cough up some cash or you’re both out.”

The lease was in Jan’s name so the girl knew her friend could make good on her word. The next time Sebastian asked her for a little to get by, she told him no.

“We need it for the rent.”

He looked calm as ever and went over to the fridge to get a beer. He got the last one and sat down staring at her. He unscrewed the top and took a big sip.

“And, another thing, you need to bring in money for groceries.” She was standing up close to the sink. Suddenly, he was behind her and pushed her up against the kitchen wall, hard. He had lifted her off her feet with his big hand around her neck.

His blue eyes were red and blood shot. He breathed heavily into her face and smelled of beer and old cigarettes. She tried to turn away but couldn’t, he had too firm a grip on her neck.

“Don’t you ever talk to me like that again, you little bitch. I know who you are and what you are. You got it?” He was talking through clinched teeth. She was terrified.

She gave a slight nod and he let her down. Then, for whatever weird reason, he started to brush her off like she had crumbs on her shirt. She started to tremble.

“I’m going now…but, we’ll talk later.” He gave her breast a tight squeeze until she winced with pain.

He backed off, grabbed the beer and stormed out of the apartment. Elu slid down the wall and just stared into space. She started to cry, little tears at first and then big, gushy ones. Her mind was a cloud of confusion and she couldn’t think. She stumbled up and went to the bathroom to take a hot bath.

The next few months, things seemed to settle down a bit. Elu continued to dance at the club. Sebastian stayed away from the apartment more and spent more time in his grubby, singles walk up working on hedge fund deals. He kept talking about big money that was just about to come in.

Elu sighed when she heard this. They were out for dinner and she paid. It usually wasn’t at the really great restaurant they had been to before, more like pizza and beer but it was food and it was hot.

She paid her rent on time and Jan accepted it without comment. Jan had gone to the pawnshop herself and got back her mother’s ruby and garnet ring. She didn’t tell Elu how much it cost her but Elu noticed that Jan’s bedroom was always locked now when she left the apartment.

It was the weekend of Mother’s Day and Jan told Elu she would be going upstate to see her mother.

“And, I know I don’t have to tell you to keep that slug out of my bedroom, right?” she arched an eyebrow at Elu.

“You’re door is always locked. How could he get in there?”

“Knowing that little creep, he could figure something out.” Her tone softened a bit. “Elu, you know I like you. Always have. But, really, if much else happens with that little bastard, I am going to have to ask you to leave. Comprende?”

Elu couldn’t do anything else but put her head down and nod. It reminded her of the way her mother used to speak to her and she felt ashamed.

Jan grabbed her trolley suitcase, locked the door on her room, and slung her purse over her shoulder. As she was about to leave, she stopped and looked at the forlorn visage of her friend. She came over and gave her a hug. “I just wish…I wish…” she seemed to be out of words for what to say. Then, turned and went out the door.

Elu sank down on a kitchen chair and stared into space. There was a little ‘ping’ on her cell phone. She opened up her message box. Daniel had sent her a message. “Grandpa in hospital, call me”. A sense of terror swept over the girl. She grabbed the phone and had a short, terse conversation with her brother. Grandpa was in the hospital because of his heart. She was scheduled to work that night but promised to come over as soon as she could.

Her shift went by in a blur and Elu found herself repeatedly looking at the clock. 1 am couldn’t come fast enough. She got off. Rocky, her favorite bouncer, found her a cab. She told him about her grandfather.

“I’m sorry babe. That sucks. Want me to beat up that lousy boyfriend of yours? Do it for free. Might make you feel better.”

In spite of herself, Elu laughed and smiled. Rocky was the biggest, buffest gay guy she had ever met. Hell, she didn’t even know what gay meant until she had moved here. She got into the taxi and told him to rush. Her body was tingling from raw nerves.

She let herself into the apartment, her outfit still on under her heavy jacket. To her surprise, Sebastian was sitting on the sofa in the living room. There was some strange man with him. A big, fat, sweaty guy. The fat guy was in his forties with thinning hair. He kept wiping his brow with a handkerchief.

“Babe, you’re home!” Sebastian was expansive. “Hey, meet my new, good client, Samuel from Milwaukee. Samuel, Elu, the Indian.”

Samuel got up to shake her hand. He was nervous. There were wet patches in the armpits of his shirt. He reached to shake her hand. “I saw your performance at the club, Miss Elu. Stunning, just stunning. You dance so well and you’re so…” he paused to find the works, “you’re so beautiful.” He stared at her transfixed.

Elu yanked her hand out of his grip and looked over at Sebastian. “I got to go change.”

“Sure thing,” he waved at her. “We’ll be here. Samuel brought you some of your favorite stuff.” He waved at the coffee table. Lines of coke were already set up on a mirror in the middle.

Elu’s mouth got dry. She pulled away and went into the bedroom. She stripped off her costume, pulled on a t-shirt, jeans and boots. A heavy sweater went over the top and a jacket with a hood. Sebastian sauntered into the room.

“Where’re you going babe? You’re going to miss the party!” He sipped his beer casually and looked over at her dressing.

Elu yanked the jacket on and spun toward him. “What is that guy doing here?” she hissed at him.

“Calm down, calm down, girlfriend,” he put his hands out in front of him as if he was surrendering. “He just came to see you. He likes you.”

Elu stared hard into Sebastian’s eyes. She was shocked to see the clear blue were darker down and seemed to have no depth anymore. In a flash of understanding, she completely got exactly why Samuel was here, this night, when Jan was gone. She pushed past her boyfriend. He tried to grab her arm but she wiggled away, grabbed her  purse and was out the door. She didn’t even bother to close it.

“Babe,” Sabastian yelled after her, “what am I going to tell Samuel?”

“Go to hell,” she shouted and banged out of the apartment building. Calling a cab, they drove straight to the hospital. Daniel was there by their grandfather’s bed. The old man was hooked up to every kind of machine imaginable. His eyes were closed. She got a chair and pulled it over to Daniel’s.

Continued

Elu’s Story – Pt V

21 Wednesday Dec 2022

Posted by in dating, families, Fiction, holidays, marriage, money, Native Americans, romance

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Elu soon found out what kind of place the club really was. She learned very fast that she had to walk quickly and be very careful leaning over so she didn’t get a hand up her skirt and practically up her ass. She was really relieved when Suzy said she was ready to dance, because that way she was up on stage and several feet away from the men. They would still reach and grab but she could avoid them better. Getting out of the dressing room after work and out the door into a waiting taxi proved to be a task but Fred had two big bouncers who would work the back doors so the girls could at least find a taxi and get into it without problem. But the telephone calls and the messages! Elu had never heard such language before. Great Mother of God!

But the money was rolling in, that made her very happy and she began to find that a quick drink before she went to work helped her get over the jitters. Then a shot or two at work were easy to get from the bartender and the whole evening passed in a flash and they were on their way back to the apartment again to crash and burn until the next day.

Life went on like this for many months. Elu tried to send some money home to her mother once. But, Mama got so upset with the gift and asked so many questions that Elu decided she would bank the money and wait until she was home again to give another gift. Life got into a pattern, that is until she met Him. Andrew Sebastian Van Houten, III at a party.

Elu saw Andrew Sebastian and her heart stopped for just a moment. The room went grey and all she could see was him. About 6’1” with beach blond hair, a tan in a white polo shirt and khaki slacks. Leather loafers and an expensive watch. She could have just watched him for hours and never even said anything. And then when he came over and started talking to them…

“Hey, Jan, how’s it going?”

“Hey, Sebastian. How’s tricks,” Jan was very casual too. “This is my new roommate, Elu.”

“Elu, that’s different,” Sebastian replied. “What is that, Chinese or something?”

Elu shook herself. “It’s Indian.”

“Oh, you’re from India. Jan didn’t tell me.”

“No, not India. I’m Indian from America. American Indian.”

“Oh, okay. American Indian. So, what, me White Man, you squaw?” Something like that?”

Elu felt herself blush. “Something like that.” She gripped her drink tighter.

“Actually, hearing myself even say that sounds pretty stupid, I have to admit. I  didn’t offend you or anything, did I?” Sebastian looked down at Elu.

She had never seen such blue eyes in her life. She stared for a moment before she could speak. “Ah, no. I’m fine.”

“Well good,” Sebastian replied good-naturedly. “Let me get you another drink and you can tell me all about…being an Indian, American Indian that is.” He took her glass out of her hand. “White wine?” She nodded, too stunned to speak. He turned and went back to the bar.

Jan was grinning like the proverbial cat. “Oh, my God. Elu, he is so into you. I can’t believe it. Sebastian Van Houten, the third. Un-fucking believable. You have any idea of how much money that guy’s got?”

“What?” Elu replied dimly. She was still watching Sebastian’s retreating figure. She was having a hard time focusing on what Jan was saying. “What?” she turned back to her friend.

“I said…” Jan drew the words out longer, “that…he…is…rich. You bimbo!”

“Rich…oh,” Elu replied softly. “That’s nice.”

“Shush, don’t say a thing about what I just told you. Just be yourself and all that stuff. I’m gonna make myself scare.”

Sebastian came back with a fresh drink, handed it to Elu and steered her over to a sofa in the corner where they could talk. Once settled in, he asked her question after question about herself. She had never had someone shower her with so much attention before. It was amazing that he had any interest in her at all. She barely touched her drink.

When it was getting late and she looked at her watch in surprise. Sebastian offered to take her home and she agreed. Before she knew what she was doing, they were in her bedroom and he was ripping her clothes off and throwing her on the bed. The sex was incredible and took Elu to heights she had never known before. While she had had sex before a few times at the back of the drive-in, that was clumsy and fast and didn’t amount to much. This, him! Her head was spinning around backwards.

Sebastian left early in the morning before Jan got out of bed and before Elu usually got up.

“I’ll call you,” he said, leaving.

She really didn’t think he would. So, when she got a text message from him later that morning she was surprised. He wanted her to go to dinner with him. Golly!

Dinner turned into breakfast and then lunch. Elu was in love and knew it. She was on cloud nine. She had never been so happy. The man of her dreams, a swell job with lots of money in a great city. What a life!

She was schedule to go to grandpa’s every Sunday. She went and burbled on and on about her new life. Daniel said little and mostly studied his plate of lasagna. Grandpa listened and sipped his wine. He didn’t say much. Finally, she ran out of steam and started eating.

Grandpa put down his wine. “What about your school?” His bright blue eyes looked into her brown ones without blinking.

Elu looked up and got uncomfortable. “School will still be there, Grandpa. It’s not going anywhere. I can always go back. I’m young. I got time.”

She looked down at her plate but not before she saw him slowly shake his head. “What are you doing Daniel?” She worked hard to steer the conversation away from herself. Daniel was finishing up his classes at the community college. He was in the process of applying to the state college and looking for scholarships. They talked about him and then about mom and the kids back home.

More and more, Elu found excused to miss Sunday dinners. She couldn’t put it into words. Just, she was strangely uncomfortable when she left and it didn’t feel good. There was one excuse after another.

Finally, she was on the phone with the old man. “Whatever, Elu, you got to do what you got to do. Don’t call to say you can’t make it, you know when we eat. Just show up, okay?”

“Sure, thanks, Grandpa. You’re so understanding.”

“Yep.” He hung up the phone. Elu stared at the phone in her hand. Had he just hung up on her? That had never happened before. Maybe he was getting batty; he was in his 80’s. She shrugged and went to get herself a beer from the fridge. They were going to a great new restaurant tonight. She needed to figure out what to wear.

The restaurant was high end and glitzy. The lights were low, the benches were padded, the people were glamourous and dressed in the latest. She was wearing a new black sheath dress with soft black sequins and thin spaghetti straps. Elu couldn’t believe someone like her could be sitting in a place like this.

The waiter came up in a neat, crisp dinner suit and Bastian picked out a wine from the list. The waiter came back and showed the bottle to Bastian who nodded. Taking out a corkscrew, the man undid the cork and pour a little into each glass.

“Madam would like to try it?” He bent over the glass and presented it to her.

Elu almost blushed with embarrassment. No one had ever called her that before. She took the glass and sipped the wine. It was delicious. She nodded and the man poured her half a glass and then her date’s.

Bastian looked at her over the little lit candles on the table. “Pretty cool, huh?”

Elu nodded. She was staring at the menu and had no idea what to order. There was so much on here that she had never heard of it; it was confusing.

“You know what you want?” He was glancing at the menu.

She sighed and closed the multi-page glossy brochure. “Can I just have a cheese burger? Fries?”

Bastian suppressed a little laugh and smiled instead. “Sure, no problem.” He looked around and snapped his fingers.

A waiter rushed over and Bastian ordered a steak for himself and the burger and fries for her. She sat and just absorbed the ambiance. This place was so cool. What Elu could not admit was how completed overwhelmed and out of place she really felt.

Bastian twirled the wine glass in his fingers. Then he lifted the long silver chain from around his neck. She had admired it many times. It was a little dancing figure playing a flute. The figure was done in turquoise, silver and coral. It was small but very beautiful.

He stood up, leaned over to Elu, and dropped the necklace around her neck.

“Oh, no! Sebastian, you can’t give me this. It’s yours! Elu fingered the necklace.

“No,” he said, “it’s yours now,” and he sat back down with a smile on his face.

“What is it again?” she asked him.

“It’s Kokopellie; the Hopi go of music and dance.”

“But, I’m not Hopi, Bastian,” she told him, “I’m Mojave.”

“I know,” he told her. “But, still I think it fits you more than me.” He drank his wine. “But, I’m not sure it goes with that old, tacky necklace you wear all the time.” He looked away.

Elu fingered the other necklace around her neck. It was old. An old, gold filigree fine linked necklace given to her years ago by her grandfather. It held a locket with picture of her two favorite people in the world; Daniel and her sister Sally. Her hand went to the necklace and her mouth puckered. Really? she felt insecure and tugged at it. Her mouth puckered. She grabbed her glass of wine and drank a big gulp. She would think about it later.

A few days later, she left the gold necklace on the top of her dresser and felt better about it. The two strands kept getting tangled up with each other. Besides, she needed to get to work and make some more of that easy money. It was a few days later that she looked at the dresser and saw a little slip of paper. She picked up the paper and read 22nd St Pawn Shop. What the hell was this? She read it again and and saw with a shock the words ‘gold necklace’. The shock traveled all through her system. Frantically she started to paw through everything on the dresser. Her necklace from grandpa was gone.

Elu dropped down to the bed with the paper clutched in her hand. The tears started to flow and fall down her face. Finally, exhausted she fell backwards on the bed and sleep stole over her. Hours later, she woke up and she realized it was early evening.

She staggered up and went to wash her face. The slip was still in her hand and she stuffed it into her jeans pocket. In the bathroom, she bent over, splashed cold water on her face, and stared at herself. There were dark circles under her eyes and she looked thinner. Elu had never been on the heavy side, always leaning to the slim. But, now…the bones along her collarbone seemed to stick out more than ever. She pulled the makeup bag over to herself and put concealer on the circles. Not that she was going anywhere, it was her day off. More because she didn’t want to see the circles in the mirror. She brushed her teeth and went to she what they had to eat in the kitchen. Opening the fridge door it looked almost empty. When had she gone shopping last?

The door to Jan’s bedroom was closed. For whatever reason she seemed to be seeing less and less of her roommate these days. She shook her head and checked her purse. There was some money in there. She grabbed her coat and purse. The corner store would have cereal and milk. She couldn’t face much else right now. She closed the front door behind her.

Continued Part VI

Elu’s Story – Part IV

21 Wednesday Dec 2022

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New York was something else entirely. Neither Daniel nor Elu could stop gawking from the moment they got off the train until they got to their grandfathers apartment in the Bronx. Never had they ever seen such tall building, so much traffic, so many people! It was utterly amazing. They got to grandad’s apartment, dropped their stuff, and demanded to be taken on the tour. So, tour they did.

This is the most amazing thing I have ever seen, Elu said to herself. I love it. I just love it!!! Daniel and Elu both learned to love the early morning coffee shops, Italian pizza places and popcorn. Elu could eat the different kinds of popcorn until she burst.

Grandpa insisted they get enrolled in their classes and start school promptly. Daniel was like a duck in water and took to advanced education like a natural. It wasn’t so easy for Elu. She had always been much more social than Daniel and soon made a whole new cadre of friends. They began to invite her here and there. They started to stop into bars for a beer. Elu had had beer at the res a few times. Most of the grownups drank some kind of beer. Usually the cheap stuff. But when she discovered the $2 pitcher specials at happy hour, followed by shooters; wow! She was in heaven. Where had this been all her life.

Naturally, her grades started to slip. Not a lot at first, but over time, school just didn’t seem all that important anymore. Then one of the girls, Jan, needed a roommate. Over many objections from both her grandfather and Daniel, Elu moved out and moved in with Jan.

Jan had a glamourous and exotic life as a dancer. Elu really didn’t believe all the stories Jan would tell until on Saturday nights she would come home with a purse stuffed cash. Then on Sunday morning, when she finally rolled out of bed, Jan would sit at the kitchen table and count out all her tips. Put them in stacks, label them and then put them in envelopes to take to the bank on Monday. The money was eye popping and definitely catching Elu’s attention.

“You made all this dancing? Just dancing?” Elu was astounded.

“Yep.” Jan was casual.

“How…how did you get started?”

“Easy actually. I took dance lessons in school and then they teach you more moves at the club. It’s easy. Even you could learn.”

Elu reached out a finger and touched one of the stacks of money. She had never seen so much of it at one time and in one place.


The next weekend Jan took her into the club and introduced her to the manager, Fred. Fred was a big fat guy with a cigar stuck in his mouth. He was sitting on a stool at the club while the maintenance crew cleaned up. He was reading a racing form.

“Ya ever dance before?” he asked Elu through cigar smoke.

He looked her up and down.

“You in pretty good shape. You look like you are.”

She nodded in agreement.

“You mind taking off some clothing?”

Elu  had no idea what he was talking about. Maybe it was a sweater or something. She decided it didn’t matter. She wanted to make some of that money so she said “No.”

“Okay, you got the job. Suzy will teach you some moves and we will give you a trial. See how well you work.  If you’re good, you’re a keeper; if not, well….” He jerked his thumb at the day. “Ya understand?”

Elu nodded furiously up and down.

“Okay, youse come back at 4pm when dey got the place cleaned up and Suzy will start ‘wit cha. Got it?”

Elu nodded again.

“She don’t talk much, do she?” he asked Jan.

“Yeah,” Jan replied, “but then again, a lot less arguments.”

“Well, there’s that.” Fred rolled his big frame off the stool and started walking to the back. “Youse two beat it fer now. Dey’s gotta clean.”

Jan grabbed Elu’s arm and hustled her out of the club.

“You got the job, you got the job!” They both jumped up and down with joy and hurried back to their apartment so Jan could help Elu find something to wear for her first night.

That night after the training with Suzy, Jan got the girl back into the wardrobe changing room to do her makeup. The first night she was just going to work the club and sell cigarettes and cigars to the patrons.

“We’re going to make you so glamorous, you won’t know yourself.”

Jan set to work with foundation, rouge, lipstick, eyeliner and false eyelashes. When she got done with that, she redid Elu’s hair into a French twist with some curls in front. She sprayed the whole thing with Freeze hairspray. Jan stood back to admire her work. She was very pleased. She swung the barber chair around so Elu could see herself for the first time.

Elu was shocked. She didn’t even recognize the face looking back at her. She had to lift up one hand and touch her face to be sure it was her. She was actually speechless.

“It’s really something, isn’t it?” Jan crowed.

“Yes, it really is.” Elu replied. “Really something.”

Elu soon found out what kind of place the club really was. She learned very fast that she had to walk quickly and be very careful leaning over so she didn’t get a hand up her skirt and practically up her ass. She was really relieved when Suzy said she was ready to dance, because that way she was up on stage and several feet away from the men. They would still reach and grab but she could avoid them better. Getting out of the dressing room after work and out the door into a waiting taxi proved to be a task but Fred had two big bouncers who would work the back doors so the girls could at least find a taxi and get into it without problem. But the telephone calls and the messages! Elu had never heard such language before. Great Mother of God!

Continued Part V

The Number Nine Bus

12 Monday Dec 2022

Posted by in Book Sales: Amazon.com/Kindle Books, cutting, dating, Fiction, homelessnes, kids, money, romance, teenagers

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                                                      THE NUMBER NINE BUS

I rode my bike up to the bus stop and parked it neatly next to the trash bin and sat myself down on the blue metal bench. Checking my watch, I saw it was ten of six pm.

Okay then, by my calculations, the Number Nine should be here at 6:10 pm.  I have twenty minutes to wait. I can live with that. 

Then, I would mount my bike on the cow-catcher at the front of the bus and be mercifully whisked out of the heat and onto my shopping errand.

Home in time to watch the new Netflix movie and in bed at a decent hour.

I patted my pocket. There were several carefully placed dollar bills and quarters there in case any of the bills stuck in the bus changer. Patiently, I waited and pulled out my IPod and stuck in my ear buds for music.

Through my Raybans I saw them walking across the street, coming my way.

Oh, no. A guy and a girl? Yes, definitely a girl, she’s shorter. Little hard to tell with all the stuff they’re carrying.

Eventually they made it to the bus stop and I looked away into middle distance, not wanting to be part of their space. Sensing my discomfort, the girl sat down with her bag between us and the guy stood up. They were talking to each other but I couldn’t hear with the ear buds.

He said something to me and I had to pull the buds out.

“…bus?  The number nine bus?”

“Yes, yes. This is the number nine bus stop. It should be here any minute.” I said helpfully. I looked at my watch. As a matter of fact, it really should have already been here, it was 6:10pm.

“…you got your bracelet, from New Mexico?” The girl was speaking at me.

“No, not New Mexico,” I replied and kept staring off to the right, away from them.

“….mine it up in the hills there,” she was saying to me. I nodded my head, the buds back in place.

My natural nosiness took over and I looked at them. Both about twenty, they were a complete rag-tag band of assorted styles, genres, mixed clothing, backpacks, bags, hats, jewelry, tats and body piercing everywhere. He was kind of shaky and red in the face.

Is he kicking? Heroin? I thought to myself. Hard to say exactly.

I had to look carefully, there was a plastic baby doll leg pinned to the side of his pack. What was most noticeable was the big green ring he had in his nose. She had nose rings too, but smaller.

I am being kind of an ass, I thought, they’re just kids.

“The bus should be along any minute now. I think maybe it’s running late,” I volunteered.

“Oh, that always happens to us,” she told me and got up and gave the guy a long extended hug.

True love. I thought. Of course, poor and in love.

She came back and sat down again. I got up and stared down the street searching desperately for that bus.

“You guys looking for a shelter ’cause there’s a Salvation Army close by…”

“No, no, we have a place to go. We’re not really hobos…my husband and I just dress like this.”

She seemed very calm with their situation. Pretty face under all the hat, feather and jewelry. He was off staring for the bus too.

“I’m from Spokane,” she volunteered. “Did you know that Spokane and Fresno are the same size? Only Spokane has more people.” This girl seemed desperate to engage me in conversation for whatever reason.

“More rain too I’ll bet,” I ventured.

“Oh, lots more rain but crazy hot this time of year. You wouldn’t believe how hot and electrical storms, lots of electrical storms.”

“Fires?”

“Oh yeah, tons of fires, crazy.” She pulled and picked at her blond hair with bright orange polish fingernails. She wasn’t really looking at me but she didn’t seem bothered by me either.

“How are the buses in Spokane?”

“They are great! Every fifteen minutes and later every half hour,” she nodded her head with assurance.

“Well, the buses in Fresno suck,” I told her looking at my watch again. It was now almost 6:30pm.

 Where the hell it that bus? The mall is going to be closed. I have skin products to buy. Damn it! I need my Clinique.

“We’re going to his Dad’s and seeing about staying the night.” She didn’t seem sure about that.

“Where does he live?”

“Riverpark area,” the guy answered. He had put his backpack down. He suddenly jumped and started hitting the bag. Something flew out and landed. They both studied the ground.

“That’s the most beautiful beetle I ever saw,” she was staring at the little grey thing on the sidewalk.

Yeah, as long as it isn’t crawling around in your backpack.

“Don’t kill it,” she said to him. He was on the ground screwing with the bug, no doubt upset it had frightened him.

“I just don’t know about this bus,” I told them. “It should have been here by now. Don’t know if it’s Saturday schedule or what.” The guy looked concerned.

“Where you going again?” I directed my question to him.

“Riverpark down Blackstone. I remember ‘cause I lived there since I was two.”

I nodded and found the location on my IPod. “This it?” He bent over to look at the phone map but didn’t get too close.   

“Yeah, that’s the place.”

“That’s a beautiful ring!” she was looking at my white pearl and malachite pinkie ring. I knew she wanted to touch it but was careful to keep her hands to herself.

“His father is from Fresno?” I asked her.

“Yeah, Fresno.”

“Well, in that case, I would probably lose the nose rings for a few days.”

She got a disturbed look on her face, frowned and crossed her arms over her chest. It was then I noticed the healed cutting scars up and down her forearm. This girl clearly had some back story. And, probably not happy .

“You know,” she had put some thought in this, “Jesus Christ was persecuted and he wore clothes just like this. We dress like this so we will be persecuted too and still carry the message.”

“Ah,” I replied.

“I don’t change myself to please other people, only to please myself,” she concluded with some finality.

How about pleasing someone enough to get a place to sleep for the night? I didn’t say anything else, her mind seemed made up.  

“I don’t know about this bus,” I said again. It was ten of seven now.

The girl disappeared in to the car wash and came back.

“The Mexican guy says no more buses,” she told us.

Damn it to hell, the Mall is going to close and I’m never going to get my stuff! I almost stamped my feet in frustration.

I walked over to my bike. Maybe I could ride there and back before it got dark.

“Perhaps if you hitch a ride with a truck they can get you to Blackstone,” I ventured.

They weren’t really listening to me anymore.

“I’m thirsty,” she was telling him. He was practically gyrating in place trying to decide what to do.

Oh, well. Guess they’ll just have to take that whole 60’s Love Child, meets Fresno Red Neck and gets ink, rings, Jesus and hits the road becoming homeless on unknown drugs and figure it out.

I got back on my bike and rode toward the mall.

Chap 11 – The Wedding

26 Saturday Nov 2022

Posted by in Book Sales: Amazon.com/Kindle Books, dating, marriage, money, romance

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Chapter Eleven – The Wedding

Here comes the bride…and the minister, and the caterers, the florist, the wedding planner, the makeup artist, the dressmaker, the hair stylist, the photographer and the lists and lists of family friends. Thirty days into this deal and you are both ready to jump on the love boat, sail to Tahiti and get married there. Wow…who knew?

Here’s the thing about your wedding…it is your wedding in name and you may even be paying some of the costs, but, your wedding and his wedding are the time in life when parents, aunts, uncles, cousins and friends, everyone who ever had a hand in your upbringing and life get to celebrate their accomplishment – you. So, although everyone tells you this is ‘your day’ it is really their day, the payoff of all those years of, well, you know. So, let them enjoy your day that they (especially your mother) have helped to create.

The Cost

Wow! Again, who knew it could be so expensive to get married? Let’s go over average costs.

Lauren Schwahn

How much does a wedding cost? A lot, it turns out.

Money – Nerdwallet  6/22/19

https://www.usatoday.com/story/money/2019/06/22/how-much-does-wedding-cost/1517727001/

Having a wedding isn’t as simple as saying “I do” – and it’s a lot more expensive.

The national average cost of a wedding is $33,931, according to The Knot’s 2018 Real Weddings Study.

Here’s what you should know about wedding costs and how to realistically estimate what you’ll spend to take the plunge.

Add it all up

Don’t bow to pressure from relatives, friends, social media or spending reports. Your wedding spending should align with your income, regular expenses and other financial goals.

Once you’ve established a budget, decided the kind of wedding you want and begun to compare costs, plug in the numbers. 

What about a simple backyard wedding, reception? Can a lot of costs be reduced that way? Of course and during the time of Covid, more and more couples have been doing just that to minimize personal contact and maximize social distancing. So, before all the vendors start yapping at you, see how much, realistically everyone wants to pay for this day. Yes, it is a very important day, however, it is one day and life does go on after. So, let’s pause. Now is the time to have a talk with mom and dad, and/or the beloved, and to think.

Honeymoon and After

Best recommendation for honeymoon and after is to not spend too much time with mom, dad and family. They all mean well, they really do. But, try as they might, family simply cannot stop with giving advice. This is the birth of a new relationship, a marriage, and the two of you have to build that relationship. There will be fights and hard times. But, if every time there is a squabble over who takes out the trash, if you run home to mom, you are not building the steps to a strong relationship – with him. He needs to be your focus now, not your parents. Time to say good bye, (mom/dad/everyone) love you, and grow up. Growing up can be very difficult. However, you’ve had a good start, family and friends gathered around, lots of gifts, now it’s your turn. To use a corny over used phrase; ‘this is the first day of the rest of your life.’

Make it a good one.

Marriage and life ever after, well, material for another book!

Finis

Cew

          You can see more of Courtney’s work at Amazon/Kindle or Kindle Vella Library.

Read more of Courtney’s writing in:

https://sites.google.com/view/webbywritercom/page-5?authuser=0

Also: Amazon/Kindle

Chap Nine – Getting Married – Togetherness

11 Tuesday Oct 2022

Posted by in dating, FRIENDSHIP, holidays, marriage, money, romance

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Chapter Nine – Togetherness

Wow! We’re together, forever!!!!

Screech! Stop@#$@#$@$@#$#@$!!!

Did you just say forever? Gee, let’s let that sink in for a mo. Wow. Forever is a really long time. Yikes!

Forever can be a very long time, especially since people are living longer. So…on to annoying habits. What are they?

Annoying habits are not really deal breakers such as: physical violence, untreated drug addiction, abusive behavior whether it is physical, verbal, mental or emotional; done in private or in public, abuse is abuse. Also, chronic womanizing (unfaithful), chronic unemployment, blaming others for their lives or fates, constant criticizing others for whatever reason: their race, beliefs, attitudes, schooling, etc. etc. You need to be aware of these traits in your intended as these can be, and should be, Very (!) red flags.

So stepping down from the top violators, what things are annoying but not ‘deadly?’

Lack of generosity – miserliness – penny pinching. Mr. Wonderful may have some habits like: he forgets his wallet when you are out on a date, he doesn’t have enough money in the wallet, his credit card is maxed out, he wants you to always ‘pay your share,’ or maybe pay his share too.

Individuals (of either sex,) who are miserly usually never see themselves as such. They are frugal, careful with money, don’t like to be taken advantage of, saving for a rainy day, saving for a car, a house, a striped Bengal tiger. You name it. There is something out there that is Important! that they are saving their shekels for and that does not include this lunch, movie, dinner, so on. You get the picture.

I would venture a guess that these traits and habits are ones of long standing. It is unlikely that your pouting about it, pulling a face, patting your foot, is ever going to change it. Contrary wise, you might be happily surprised that your beloved has money in the bank, can pay for gasoline, is contributing to a 401k plan and has other good and conscientious money habits. Perhaps and perhaps not. Sometimes only time will tell on this one. To put your mind at rest, there is nothing wrong with full disclosure to each other of your full financial portfolio, both assets and liabilities. This could prevent some nasty surprises later on.

However; back to Mr. Stingy. I have heard many times from men, “I don’t believe in Valentine’s Day. It’s just a commercial gimmick to squeeze money out of people.” Ok, maybe so. However, that thinking can then domino into the same thinking for birthdays, Mother’s Day, Thanksgiving, and Christmas. There is a lot of commercialization for all these events, that’s no reason to give up on traditions and throw the baby out with the bath water.

After you have been with your beloved for over 6 months (more like one year,) and you don’t get anything for Valentine’s Day and/or your birthday card is one to two weeks late, or none, it’s time to get really clear. Pick you battles. If you can let Valentine’s Day slide, okay. Your birthday, no.

You are permitted to give your beloved ‘reminders’ of the upcoming date. Mark his calendar, whether desk or wall. Start talking about your upcoming birthday one or two weeks in advance; put some kind of reminder on Facebook, Twitter or any social media he may use. If the “I don’t believe in commercialized events like birthdays….” speech starts, you stop, look him right in the eye and say, “I really expect a card for my birthday and maybe a little something, dinner out, whatever, for that day. If that does not happen, I will be very disappointed.” You have said your piece, shut up and walk away. Whatever you do, do not argue the point, defend yourself or start to defend Hallmarks. Believe me, he will have heard you. If you are still in the dating period, when he should be on his Very Best Behavior, and he refuses to listen to you and your simple request (it is) you need to stop and have a think. Do you want to be tied to a man who has so little care about what his partner wants, he ignores your requests, just because he thinks it’s silly? Those ski boots he is saving for aren’t ‘silly’ are they?

Other small habits.Stop and think about some of the most annoying habits that people engage in that really get under your skin.

For me, one was at a church discussion group that met weekly. One married man would sit in his chair, pull out his nail clippers and clip his fingernails and let the clippings fall to the carpet. Gak!!!!

Another one, and I know he doesn’t mean anything by it, is a man who is part of another group. This man peppers every sentence or two with “You know,” and then he laughs. After a while I want to scream, “No, I do not know. Why don’t you try to explain it?” Anyway, pretty sure he has done it so long, he doesn’t realize what it sounds like. Also, he comes to the meetings in t-shirts that are covered in food stains. I almost can’t stand to look at his shirts, but my eye is drawn there like some horrible accident on the road you can’t stop looking at.

Lastly is the one where the man dismisses or minimizes your job, your degree (s), your total career, your accomplishments, your medals, prizes, family, whatever. For many people, especially when it comes to college degrees, they never reconcile themselves to the fact that they don’t have one. Since they have basically given up on the idea in general, they seek to ‘level the playing field’ by diminishing the importance of any degree and say things like “Real life work experience is the thing that really counts.”

Well, yes, experience certainly does count. So does having a college degree. If you find yourself at the receiving end of comments like these it may be time to rethink the relationship in general or have a serious talk with your intended.

Well, you know, you have your own list I’m sure. You know?

Read more of Courtney’s writing in:
https://sites.google.com/view/webbywritercom/page-5?authuser=0
Also: Amazon/Kindle
https://amazon.com/author/courtneywebb